No, he had thought of something else, and in trying to recall the past, almost forgotten it. There were family, outside, somewhere.
And those windows, two, set side by side, with the, what is that type of shade, sun-blocker, checked online, anyways, the shade drawn down halfway on one window, and all the way on the other. A desk lamp, and the computer screen, also illuminated the space.
Are they called blinds, or shades?
They were old he thought, standing up, moving across the room. Inspected them. Returning he tried to retain the name of the company which made them, at least as old as when he first stepped into the house. Levolver. Cellular Shades.
Dice and pencil. Already bored with the topic, but trying to focus on something, and also, nothing in particular. To let the mind flow. Thinking of calling friends. People unspoken to in a while. Not true. Not specific enough. To talk to two people, one talked to often, over the past year, but not recently enough. The other, not as often, not as recently. Thought he was visiting soon.
Thoughts give out eventually. Just like everything. They are difficult to conjure while solitary, sitting in a solo room, intent on work.
Already checking. And fixing errors. And preserving.
A check. Most objects have no story. They aren't worth telling. It's part of the mess. It transitions from teal on the left, through yellow, to a pale orange. Not a solid color either, but thin strips of color, densely packed onto a white background, (like the marks left by ice skates on a smooth surface) the...
Nothing can truly be uninterrupted, or displayed as conceived. It's delayed by the motion of production. Would it be improved by more consideration, refinement? If he were to stand up, push away the chair, and walk downstairs, would this, what is the best word here. Is he trying to use the exact language of the brain, or to put it into some more comprehensible order. Would this experiment work twice? Has it once? And would it be better if the work was compiled somewhere else, with different stimuli?
But to compile it would require a freedom to act uninterrupted as the events around unfolded. Not act, but record, like a historian watching Booth shoot Lincoln. He tosses aside the check. Would it be like..
In thinking the interrupting thought, the train bounces from its rails. A train is not a good metaphor, analogy, because it is solid, and these are not, nor do they last for hours, as train trips presumably do. He would not know. He has rarely traveled by train. Only once, or twice, for a short distance. Except the subway...
Do you learn something of him, that he calls it the subway? Perhaps you call it that as well. He wants to search where people call them subways. But also what else they...
Too many to record, losing them, like...
… call it elsewhere. Underground certainly. And that is all he knows. He resists the temptation to search again, like he did earlier. But he can't resist a second temptation, even though he has a good estimate. Does he?
Checking.
Not bad.
It's an effort of will. What's the other word? Perseverance. No. He doesn't think either of those is quite the one.
He remembers a previous thought, as the previous string, wisp, continued. They fought. And instead of describing either, now he describes the collision, forgetting both.
But collisions are often solid. Like a car collision, this thought convergence leaves a wreckage (he was convinced in his youth – no, rather, younger than now, but probably in 20's, to think of car crashes as car collisions, not as accidents. Though, reconsidering, in nearly all cases, the crash was not intended. But it is not accidental, like...
And he has to review the definition of accident...
It is too easy, too difficult to resist, to look up information at a moment's notice...
…
Without a record of prior thoughts, even with a record, it is easy to forget nearly all of them, consigning them to an infinity of oblivion. Or perhaps the other way around, and oblivion of infinity. And then, if fixed, this won't make sense of the prior statements (Not fixed!).
Editing...
Three glimmerings are more than one concentration can handle. It would be easier to intentionally abandon one, or the other, or the third. But doing so feels like failure. Instead there is this overlying chain, trying to contain them with additional commentary. Not that anything underneath was of particular significance.
He won't check yet, that drip, drip, drip. Of effort, time, and lack thereof.
Is a car crash an accident? It is unintended, and unexpected. But accident might imply (reading)...
Sometimes these are more precise words from the brain, and other times, more of a rendering, an after-thinking through. Focusing on the process slows it, like leaves in the drain slow the flow of water.
… implies a lack of fault.
It's possible, It's possible, It's possible. That one can trick thought, thinking the same words, while glimpsing other ideas behind them.
And whether...
Try it.
And whether, it would be better, not to change the place, but to eliminate a prior problem...
In case the reader wonders, the definition of accidents, cars or otherwise, is no longer under consideration.
… problem, reading, and whether it would be better not to change the place, but to eliminate the prior problem, a recording might prove more serviceable.
Checking. No he doesn't care about giving in.
Is this what you would call something? Is this what you would call, calling it in? That is, in fact, an idiom, reviewing the background of the reference...
He had a longer paragraph, somewhere in the ether, but it escaped, like blue balloons flying away into the sky.
… to confirm. And if you believe it is, how can you know, the time and effort spent unless you witness.
Ah well, it is what it is, and people will see what they see. Words on a white, rectangular form.
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